Constant in the Trials and the Change

At 5:30 PM Wednesday, my flight landed in Manhattan, Kansas. I had so many thoughts and emotions upon arrival. I missed my team and Swaziland, but it felt so relieving to be back on Kansas’ soil after two days of airports. I had a joyful reunion with roommates and friends, and I was so grateful for a safe journey home.

Re-entry is hard. Culture shock is definitely real, and jet lag is annoying. I was so overwhelmed by the hundreds of drink options at Sonic. My first trip to the grocery store was way more emotionally intense than the average American experiences. I miss my team. I still haven’t grown used to sleeping on a real bed all by myself in an apartment all to myself, nor the freedom to go wherever I want, whenever I want, without a buddy system.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m so thankful to be back. I’m grateful for high-speed Internet and running water and my car and clean laundry and easy contact with family.  And God is still teaching me and growing me every single day.

One of God’s lesson plans for me this summer was strength. I am not a strong person, emotionally or physically. I never have been. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I tend to cry in stressful situations. However, the more I learned to rely on God and go to him with all my stress, heartache, and anger, the stronger and bolder he made me.

I’m not strong. God is strong, and the strength and boldness within me is not mine. It’s his.

I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content, whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:10-13

God is constant. He is the same God in the New Testament as in the Old Testament. He is the same God in Swaziland as in America, and he will not abandon me. As I continue to rely on him with all the culture shock and readjustment, he will continue to build me up and strengthen me.

He will teach me to be content in any and every situation, whether in Africa or America, in community or alone.

I can do everything through him who gives me strength.